First blog!

Charlie here. I have been thinking about writing a blog for a while to be able to look back and reflect on my daily life with the kids, but also to share my experiences good and bad in order to hopefully help people through similar times.

Being a parent is hard, you have to be on all the time, you feel as if you have to be happy all the time. You are meant to be able to hold down a job, and still find time to do things you enjoy and still look after the kids, playing with them, teaching them, cooking for them and cleaning up after them, because let's face it however many times we nag at them to take their cups out and put their clothes away, it's  always gonna be quicker and easier to just do it ourselves.

For me the transition to this lifestyle was very difficult. The children that I raise are not biologically mine. I came in to their lives when they were 2 and 4. I was used to complete peace and quiet and enjoyed laying in bed on my phone. The lifestyle I found here was a lot different. A crazy life with a hard working single dad doing everything he could to give the boys the best life he could after their difficult start. It took a long time for me to understand that it wasn't as simple as telling the kids to stop or also to realise they were not being loud to be annoying they were just kids having fun. We have all been through a big transition and some very testing times. Now I find myself bored when the kids arnt around, and troubled by the quietness. it's been hard but I finally feel like we are there.

It still gets hard at times of course it does, it gets difficult when everyone's tired and when everyone wants to be right. It is difficult when there isn't enough attention to go around and when you need to show your child you still love them more than anything when there driving you completely crazy! It's been hard because people think they have the right to tell us we are not a proper family and to tell me how much I do or do not love the boys. It was hard when My anxiety rocketed and being at work where I felt shy and uncomfortable and always struggled to act like nothing was bothering me, was where I preferred to be over home life because things were so stressful.

Now  it finally feels that we are in a good place, I'm not tricking my self in to thinking it's going to be perfect everyday, but I have my happy family and my gorgeous boys and I want to share that life with you all!

So here goes, this might burn out after a week or It might be completely boring, but I'm going to document the busy life of a mum and how it's always worth it as long as the kids (and often grown ups) are having fun!